The Only Way Out?
by TartanLioness
Summary: What is going on in a seventeen year old Minerva's mind? Is everything just like her outside? Spotless and proud? Or are her thoughts as caotic as many other teenagers' are? PG13 for intended suicide. R and R, please!


A/N: I corrected a few mistakes pointed out by Amandah Leigh…. Thank you so much! I appeciate it! Hope you think this is better!

**Portkey's Miss-Mione: Yeah… I like it too! Glad you enjoyed it! I tried to get my own feelings into it… Once I was thinking about suicide myself… never went through with it… obviously! Lol… **

**Quill of Minerva: Yeah, I know Anna showed Slytherin traits but I had to put her in Ravenclaw for the purpose of the story… I'm getting attacted by plot-bunnies at the moment and I will probably write a sequal or a second chapter with his POV… just have to think of a way he could know, eh? Lol**

**Girl form iceland: Glad you liked it… It's supposed to be sad! Lol! Love from Denmark! I know where Iceland is though… I lived in Greenland and was very interested in both islands…**

**Sola: awww…. Thanks! (blushes) I'm very gald you think it's that great… There might be a sequal with Albus' POV…**

**Silver Sorceress: (gives you a kleenex) awww… sorry for making you cry… glad you liked it though… (smile)**

**Amandah Leigh: Yeah… I replaced the story and I hope this is this is better… Thank you so much for pointing out the little mistakes! Glad you liked it anyway! **

Title: The only way out?

Author: Tartan Lioness

Classification: Angst! And a lil bit of romance… VERY lil bit!

Set: Minerva's seventh year..

Warning: This is kinda dark and angsty… but a happy ending I promise!

Disclaimer: All I own is the plot. I have no money so please don't sue me!

A/N: Thanks to Lily for being my beta, friend and Soul Sistah! Luv ya!

'_This is it'_, She thought as she looked down on the ground far beneath her. Standing in the Astronomy Tower she was 100 feet above the grounds of Hogwarts.

She was in her seventh year of school and for seven long years she had endured her fellow-students' comments on being a teacher's pet. For seven years she had endured it without anyone to turn to. She didn't have any friends, not any real ones anyway. Sure, she had one or two but she knew that they had only befriended her so they could copy her homework. And she had let them. Because they were the only ones she had. She never felt like she fitted into her family. All of her anchestors had been sorted into Ravenclaw but not her. No, the Sorting Hat had put her in Gryffindor. Her parents had been disappointed, she knew. They had tried not to show it but they were.

For Minerva McGonagall's younger sister, Anna, everything came easily. She had waltzed through her OWLs with an ease Minerva envied her. Minerva had always studied hard, from the moment she arrived at Hogwarts, which resulted in the fact that she had no friends. She was always buried in work.

Her parents had always loved Anna more than Minerva. It was always, 'This is Anna, our youngest daughter, an absolute Ravencalw, and that is Minerva, Anna's sister.'

When Minerva had been Sorted into Gryffindor her parents were quite disappointed. That Anna the next year was Sorted into Ravenclaw didn't make things better. Anna made friends with three girls from some of the best wizarding families on the train to the school and as Minerva entered her third year, Anna had a bunch of close friends. Minerva had none. And for some reason Anna seemed to enjoy taunting her about it. Comments like, 'What are you doing this weekend, Min? Hanging out with your homework? I don't suppose you got any friends.' All Anna's friends would laugh and turn their backs on the black-haired beauty. Then she would bury herself even more in her homework.

Anna seemed to go through a phase of life earlier than Minerva; teenage. Minerva never really became what people would refer to as a 'typical teenager'. She never became really interested in boys, nor make-up or jewelery. But Ana on the other hand had had crushes on fifteen different guys at the age of thirteen. And Minerva was sick of it. Everything was always 'Anna this' and 'Anna that'.

Minerva had decided she wanted to make her parents proud of her with her NEWTs and she knew that she had done well in her exams. And yet, it felt like something was missing. She didn't fit in anywhere, not at home, not in school. Nobody cared. So what if she jumped? They would see her lifeless body in the morning and wonder why. Why would the bookworm, the loner kill herself? They would be asking themselves, 'What happened? Why did she do it? Did something happen?' and nobody would have the answers because no one had cared enough to ask her if she was okay.

Her family would maybe mourn for a while, then they'd go on with their lives and Anna would get her own NEWTs so they could celebrate. They wouldn't miss her at all! They'd have their perfect little daughter and after all Anna was the important one.

So here she was standing. In the Astronomy Tower in the middle of the night. To end it all. To end her misery. No one would think that the shy, silent bookworm would ever even think about suicide. Not her, not Minerva McGonagall. No one knew of the caotic thoughts running around in her head all the time. No one really cared. The bookworm, the teacher's pet, the insufferable know-it-all could take care of herself, she didn't need anybody.

But she did. They just didn't know. They just didn't care. And that was they reason why she was standing there, ready to jump. She looked up at the moon, her vision blurred by her unshed tears. She wanted to leave this world. She wanted to leave everybody behind. Everybody but one. The one person who seemed to have seen the girl she was instead of the bookworm; her professor. Transfiguration teacher, Professor Albus Dumbledore. He had been so kind to her, not only because she was number one in the class, like all the other teachers. No, he seemed to see the girl she was. Seemed to see underneath her façade of stone.

So she thought about him as she got ready to end it all. He was probably the only one who would miss her.

She took a step forward and was about to jump when she stopped. _'Footsteps? Impossible! No one knows I'm here! No one cares! It's merely wishful thinking, Minerva, that someone would actually care. Wishful thinking!' _

"Minerva!" She didn't turn around. She was hallucinating, she knew it. Why would anyone be there?

"Mineva! Please don't do that! Don't jump!" Minerva swallowed. She knew it was only in her mind. But then why did it sound so real? _'Because I want it to be real, that's why! Because I want him to care!'_

She closed her eyes. Another step forward. Stopped again. Swallowed. Opened her eyes as she felt a hand on her arm. "Minerva, please don't do that. I beg you, don't." She frowned. Then she finally turned around, slowly, afraid she would see no one there. But someone _was_ there. The person she had hoped would care was there. Albus Dumbledore.

"Why not? Why should I not do this? Give me one good reason!"

"You have too much to live for!"

"Like what? I have no friends! I'm not worthy of my family! All I have is my studies! And now they're over! My years here at Hogwarts are finished! I have nowhere to go now! I have no friends! Do you have ANY idea how that feels?"

"No, Minerva, I don't know how that feels. But you have at least one friend. You have me."

"You? Ha! Maybe through my school years you have been my friend. But tomorrow I'm leaving Hogwarts! And then I'm all alone! So why? Hogwarts is my home! Not the McGonagall Manor! HOGWARTS!"

"You're always welcome here, Minerva. Here at Hogwarts or at my place, if you ever need someone to talk to. I'll be here. I promise. Please don't waste your life away. Don't jump, Minerva. Please don't." He was crying.

Minerva's own tears rolled down her cheeks as she stepped down to him. "I'm sorry, Professor. So sorry," she sobbed. He gathered her in his arms.

"It's okay, Minerva. Everything will be okay. Just never, ever scare me like that again, okay?" It was only at this point Minerva realized that he had been calling her by her given name all the time. She nodded.

"I promise, Professor."

0000000

Minerva never thought about suicide again. Albus never told her how he had known she was in the Astronomy Tower. Minerva joined the Aurors for a while before coming back to Hogwarts to teach.

Albus and Minerva were best friends for almost a hundred years before he died. They were married for ninety of them. Hogwarts became her home in more than one way, she taught her cubs with a great passion and she was always very careful in her observation of her young charges, making sure none of them ever committed suicide. She was strict, yes, but her Gryffindors knew that she cared about them. They knew that they could come to her if they had problems. And they did come to her.

Anna McGonagall became a wizard lawyer, she got married to a handsome, rich man who absolutely adored her. And yet something was missing in her life. Something Minerva had. Minerva did maybe not have the best paid job, maybe not the most rich and handsome husband. But to her it was all she had ever wanted. To her Albus was the most gorgeous hunk in the world, to her teaching was worth more than money. She was happy. So in the end, Minerva came on top. She was the lucky one. She followed her dream instead of trying to make her parents proud of her.

'Know yourself and follow your heart' was the advice she gave many students over the years.

**THE END!**

**A/N: wow… I have no idea where this came from… maybe from talking about suicide with one of my friends… I dunno… Anyway, REVIEW!**


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